Breaking New Ground

I’ve been using the local library a lot to do my work because I’ve found that I am undistracted and can stay focused there, which allows me to be very effective with my time. Yesterday, I checked out a library in another town for the first time. I had intended to do this for a while, but when I look back on it, “fear of the unknown” is what had stopped me in the past. You may be thinking, fear of what? Really, I’m not sure. Fear that I wouldn’t like the library. Fear that they didn’t have internet access for me to do my work. Fear that it would take work to maneuver through the stacks of books. Fear that it would be a waste of time. Maybe it was a combination of all these things–that are really ridiculous excuses. Well, when I got there, I loved the atmosphere. I didn’t know exactly where things were, so I simply asked. I found comfortable workstations with a beautiful view of the outdoors and with great internet access. They even had a nice beverage station where I could purchase a cup of coffee/tea. So I happily sat down and worked for three hours. And of course, I thought to myself, “I wish I had come here sooner!” And the best part is that I haven’t even explored the entire library or looked through the stacks of books. I’m sure I’ll be making some new discoveries the next few times I’m there for a visit.

What’s my point? Do you ever get so caught up in your routine that it becomes boring, dull, lackluster, not-so-much fun anymore? We see and do the same things and go to the same places day in and day out and before long, we put a veil over our eyes and we miss or ignore the intricate details of what is going on around us, simply because it’s become so familiar. We bias our perspective because of what we think “is” and in some ways get lazy with our vision. We think we know what to expect so we don’t bother to pay close attention. But there’s something exhilarating and exciting about venturing into the unknown and discovering the new and the different. Time and again, I find that these types of experiences wake me up, give me a jolt of energy and make my brain cells happy. And it doesn’t have to be anything earth-shattering for this to happen. Driving down an unfamiliar road and discovering something interesting or trying a new café or listening to a new artist’s music or checking out a new library are all things that work. And the more we get into the habit of shaking it up a bit in little ways, the more likely we’ll be inclined to try the big, bold things, like travel to a new country or jump out of a plane. : ) No, I don’t have that in my immediate plans, but I won’t say that I will never do it. In the meantime, though, I am going to make it a habit of breaking new ground…

It's How You Play the Hand You're Dealt

Lots of research has revealed that in order to keep our brains healthy and active late into our years, we must exercise them. Some of the best ways to do this include keeping active social lives, constant learning, reading, exercise, and even puzzles, board games, and cards. My parents play card games often, as a couple, or with friends, and I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s one reason they’re sharp as tacks. They’re both in their early 70s and are more mentally agile than I can remember. To play cards with them is an interesting experience because their competitive natures emerge with a vengeance. When they’re playing alone, my mother seems to have this uncanny ability to shut out my father without mercy. Last night, I was playing with them and she wasn’t doing so well. My Dad said to me, “don’t feel too sorry for her, she usually beats me pretty badly.” Honestly, I wouldn’t feel sorry for anyone, including myself, because it’s cards and it’s meant to be fun.

Last night we played a card game called Golf. As we were playing, I realized how many layers of complexity there were to this relatively simple game. To understand this, though, you need to know the rules. Each player is dealt nine cards that are laid face down like a tic-tac-toe game. The players each turn over one row or column of three cards, whichever they choose. The object of the game is to get as low a score as possible from all nine cards, for each of nine hands. Kings and three-of-a-kind rows/columns count as zero, jokers are -3, aces count as 1, the remaining face cards are 10, and number cards are counted at face value. Players take turns drawing from the deck, deciding if they want to keep the card they’ve drawn, and if so, for which card they want to exchange it, i.e., do they want to replace a card whose value is already visible, or replace one that is face down. The hand draws to an end when one player has turned over all nine of his or her cards and the remaining players have had one final draw.

I feel as if some card games are “primarily” dictated by the luck of the draw. This is partly true in Golf as well, but in addition, the outcome of the game is greatly determined at each step along the way. First, the three cards a player decides to turn over can make all the difference, since these are the only cards that they may keep, if they so choose. Second, if a player decides to keep a card that they’ve drawn from the deck (or the discard pile), the card they replace it with can make or break the hand. For example, I can’t tell you how many times, by chance, my father threw a King to my mother, replacing it with something less valuable. Or how many of us replaced jokers with something less desirable. And once a card is in its place, it cannot be moved to another position; it either stays or is replaced with another card. And then comes the final turn around the table. If a player still has one or more cards to turn over, the card they choose to replace with their final draw can make all the difference to their hand because even though they may not be the first person to turn over all their cards, they still may wind up with the lowest score in that hand.

This game reminded me more of life than any other card game I've ever played. For any goal or journey we take in life, each choice we make along the way influences how things will unfold. We usually begin with a certain number of “knowns” that help us to decide how to move forward. Along the way, some choices are easy to make; we can see what we are dealing with. But others offer more options or carry greater risks and we don’t always know how they will turn out, but once we've made the move, we can't take it back. And those choices will eventually influence later decisions. Also, the choices we make can often greatly influence others, sometimes helping them (if they choose to accept the help), or sometimes not. But hopefully they don't hurt someone. And finally, if we stay in the game, we may not be the first to cross the finish line, but we may still come out a winner - or not, we just don't know. But that shouldn't stop us from living because we can look back at the choices we made and either be happy with them, or learn from them.

We had a fun time with this game last night and we laughed a lot. I think that’s something else that helps to keep the mind young. My Dad won the game with the lowest score for nine hands, but in the particular hand that’s shown in the picture, I had a score of “0”. That’s even better than a hole in one! : )

Risky Business

A few weeks ago, I heard rustling in the trees above me and when I looked up, I spotted a squirrel. I watched as it chomped away at the clusters of seeds hanging from a branch. I looked around and saw that several squirrels were also eating in the trees. What struck me about them was that they were not sitting safely on a stable end of a branch close to the trunk, but they were out near the tip, clinging onto the skinny end of the branch as it swayed or bounced with their every movement. This didn’t seem to bother them at all. In fact, when they had had enough to eat, they began to leap between the trees, from one skinny branch to the next. If they lost their footing, they would simply regain it and move on to the next limb. I initially thought that this seemed like risky business, but the squirrels looked highly alert, invigorated, and alive.

How many of us play it safe by hanging out near the trunk where the limbs are strong and stable and how many of us are taking risks and living life out on the skinny branches? The high wire acrobat Papa Wallenda one said, “Life is lived out on the wire, the rest is just waiting.” It’s when we’re trying something new and testing our limits that we feel the most alive and it’s the biggest risks that lead to the greatest rewards.

If you think about it, almost everything we’re doing in our lives right now was, at one time, something new we learned – a risk we took and once we figured out we liked it or it simply felt comfortable, we stuck with it. But notice how over time, many of these things we do no longer stimulate or engage us as they did when they were new. Working as a scientist, I remember what it would feel like when I was trying an experiment for the first time. I would have read the protocol several times and would have everything ready on the bench. I would be switched on and focused and my energy level would be high. My entire being would be fully engaged. But once the experiment entered my comfort zone after repeating it several times, it no longer had the same stimulatory effect. In fact, sometimes I would almost be conducting it unconsciously.

The human brain craves novelty. And the stronger it gets, the more pushing it needs to stay sharp and stimulated. Would we read the same book over and over, never picking up something new to read? Would we eat the same food all day every day? I don’t think so. These things would lose their appeal. Risk involves greater endeavors, greater challenges but also greater opportunity for growth. Of course not every risk will reap a reward. It is inevitable that we fail at some. But taking no risks at all will yield no rewards 100% of the time. I believe that if we take risks, in the end, succeed or fail, we will inevitably grow. And if we spend as much time as we can on the skinny branches we can only increase the chances of this occurring.