Today is a Gift

The other day at my parents’ house, I reached into the cabinet to get something and noticed the china. It’s always been in that particular cabinet and in fact, it’s been stored there for over forty years. The thing is, it never gets taken out of that cabinet and every time I see it, I think to myself, what’s the point of having it if it’s never used? Many people reserve their china or their crystal or their nice linens for special occasions (or maybe not use them at all). And I think many of us do the same thing with other “things” in our lives, like nice clothing or accessories or furniture (take, for example, the formal living room that is off limits). We save these things for that special event or day and revert to our “everyday” items the majority of the time. But a couple of years ago, I was moving into a smaller place and had to make decisions about what to keep and what to give away or sell. So what did I do? I saved only my most favorite items. I gave away boxes of shoes and bags of clothing, kitchen items and even furniture that I had accumulated but didn’t need or particularly care for. I lightened my load considerably, which among other things, simplified my life tremendously. And in so many ways, it helps me have less of an impact on the environment. For example, during that time, I decided I would only use my pretty cloth napkins so I no longer buy paper napkins.

The point I am trying to make with all of this is we can make our days more relaxing, more enjoyable and even more special by having less “stuff”, and by only having things that we love. Less stuff helps to create a less cluttered, lower maintenance life style. It leaves more room, more time, and even more money, for “doing” fun and enjoyable things as opposed to “having” things. Life can be chaotic enough with our daily obligations and schedules, so any way we can minimize the busyness, physically and mentally, the better. It also enables us to be present for those moments that may spontaneously arise. For example, last night, there was a mesmerizing full moon that I was able to fully immerse myself in without the worry of what had to happen next. In a similar manner, how would our days feel if we only surrounded ourselves with the things we love? What if we only had nice dishes that we used everyday? And we treated that beautiful outfit as everyday-wear instead of leaving it hidden in the closet, waiting for a special occasion to arrive? What would our lives be like if we considered all of our days special? The fact is, they are all special because we don’t know what will happen tomorrow or next week, or even a few hours from now. When thinking about the things that I’m grateful for, “this day” is always on the list. I get that anything can happen. It’s not something that I focus on, but it’s something that always comes to mind if I’m having a bad day or feeling down. I remind myself that I’m still here, and surrounded by people (and yes, some things) for which I’m grateful. Maybe you’ve heard the saying by Leslie Gerber, “Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is mystery. Today is a gift. That’s why it’s called the present.” So if you can, find ways celebrate your days and make them feel like the most extraordinary you’ve had so far - even if you only do something as simple as using the cloth napkins.

Angels Have Bird Wings and Fairies Have Butterfly Wings

Last week, I posted a blog describing how to use essential oils to very easily make hydrating atomizer misting sprays using essential oils. I bought the supplies at a great herb and gift shop in Somers, CT called Kassandra, It’s About Thyme, Herbs Unlimited, and had mentioned that I would be introducing the owner very soon. Well, yesterday, I met with Katherine (Kassy) Mashiak at her shop. Kassy has been studying herbs for about three decades and spoke about her interest in herbs. You can meet Kassy in the video below:

Kassy began gardening and wanted to learn more about preparing teas, and a lecture many years ago on herbs got the ball rolling for her. She incorporates herbs into her everyday life and uses them medicinally and her shop carries over 200 herbs and herb related items in bulk for health and wellness as well as for cooking. Kassy is also a founding member of the Connecticut Herb Association (CHAI), a group that brings an amalgam of information to the table about everything herbs, from growing to harvesting to using medicinally or in foods or extracting essential oils; a member of CHAI will have extensive knowledge and expertise. CHAI also hosts an annual Herb Fest of CT, that happens the first Saturday in June. This year, it will be held in Somers, CT and for anyone interested, please check the CHAI website for more information.

Back to Kassandra, It’s About Thyme, Herbs Unlimited; what I didn’t mention yet, is that Kassy’s shop is set in a circa 1830 post and beam barn, a very bright, pink barn! Walking in the front entrance, I fell in love with the rustic setting that was softened by the flood of the sun’s rays beaming in through the windows and that made so many of the items sparkle. This front room was a feast for the eyes. It has an array of jewelry, loose leaf and bagged teas (and bags to make your own bagged teas), books, diffusers, ornaments, stones and crystals, beautiful scarves, wind chimes, and a section dedicated to a beautiful collection of angels and fairies (which are her favorites).

She pointed out that angels have bird winds and fairies have butterfly wings. I had never thought about that before yesterday! In fact, she told me about a favorite illustrator of hers, Cicely Mary Barker, who was fascinated with flowers and used them to design her fairies. Venturing into her back room, you’ll find her extensive selection of bulk herbs, supplements, homeopathic remedies, natural cosmetics, more jewelry, essential oils and clays, and gourmet foods. I’m sure I’m forgetting something; in fact, I’m sure of it because I bet I’ve still only seen half of what she has to offer. Kassy's shop is the type of place where you discover something new each time you visit.

It’s always fun to meet new people. Everyone has a story to tell and a wealth of knowledge to share and you just never know what you’ll learn. Yesterday, I learned some things about herbs I didn’t know (and yes, there’s so much more for me to learn if I choose) and was introduced to a artist whose love of flowers inspired a beautiful collection of fairies.

So, if you’d like to treat yourself to something fun or are looking for a unique gift, visit Kassandra, It’s About Thyme, Herbs Unlimited, 53 Springfield Road, Somers, CT. It’s like dessert without all the calories : )

Remember When??

I spent this past weekend with my two grandsons, Carmine and Antonio, ages three and five. I remember being in denial about the idea of becoming a grandmother at what I thought was too young of an age for me, but now, I realize it’s been a blessing. I adore my grandkids and they have come to be a source of pure joy for me and because I’m in fairly good condition physically, I’ve been able to actively participate in just about anything these two bundles of energy have wanted to do. We play baseball and Frisbee and run together and climb the jungle gym at the playground. They’ve “practiced” yoga with me and we’ve played in the sand at the beach, and built with LEGO bricks and thanks to my young age and health, I’ve always been able to share with them my energy and enthusiasm.

They too, unknowingly share something very valuable with me when we spend time together. Their free-spirited personalities and their fearlessness – two things we all are born with that slowly diminish with time and experience. This weekend alone was filled with examples of how they live uninhibited and in the moment that we can all learn from. They live next to a high school that sits atop a steep, grassy hill overlooking a newly renovated expanse of school property with soccer, baseball and football fields. The hill is perfect in the winter for sledding, snowboarding and even teaching the little ones to ski. I often take them out the field to run in the wide-open spaces and this weekend we went out there with their bikes. They wanted to climb the hill to ride in the parking lot above, but on the way up, Antonio decided he wanted to ride his bike down the hill. What do you think immediately went through my head? “Maybe he shouldn’t do that.”; “Is it safe?”; “What if he falls?”; “What if he gets hurt?” Was he thinking any of these things? Absolutely not. The only thoughts on his mind were “Here I go!” and “Whoa!” And before I could even say “Wait!”, he had taken off down the hill and reached the bottom safely. In fact, the second time he went down, he took his eyes off where he was going. He began to look to the left, then to the right, then down and eventually lost control of the handlebars and flipped off the bike at the bottom. I told him what I saw and why I think he fell and what do you think he did? Without uttering a sound, he got up, climbed back up the hill and immediately tried again, this time looking straight ahead the whole time. And he was successful from that moment forward, every time he rode down the hill. How many of us would make such an attempt so soon after wiping out? Would we not focus on the failure and be paralyzed with fear, convincing ourselves that we should give up and move on to something else or possibly be afraid to try something else? The spill taught him a valuable lesson about what does not work and he simply used that information to get it right. It allowed him to come out successful and confident.

That night, they wanted me to watch the movie Robots with them so we sat on the sofa for what I thought would be a relaxing and entertaining evening. Relaxing no, but highly entertaining! About ten minutes into it, the movie broke out into a song. Without warning, Carmine jumped off of my lap and began to dance to the music, shaking his bottom and jumping and moving his arms. Pretty soon, Antonio joined in and it turned into a combination dance/martial arts demonstration. Would you believe that the credits were rolling and they were still on the carpet dancing? Maybe my video camera had something to do with that, but not once were they thinking, “Will I look silly if I get up and dance like this?”, “Will I be laughed at?”, “I’m really no good at this, I shouldn’t do it.” How many of us have been in that position, holding back what’s aching to come out for fear of looking silly or not being good enough? Instead, they let their spirits soar and were so filled with happiness and energy. And this was after an entire day of excitement and physical movement. We always wonder where children get their energy. I don’t think we as adults get tired because we become old; I believe this vitality disappears because we lose our courage to live our passions. We can have this type of energy at any age. Our bodies may not perform like those of children, but we can have that life and enthusiasm if we’re doing what we love to do and are not concerned about how we look doing it or what others will think. Because chances are, what they’re thinking is, “Why don’t I have the guts to do that?”

Do you remember a time when you had this fearlessness? Do you remember when your main goals were to have fun in the moment and to express your true selves? I can’t say I do, maybe because I can’t remember back far enough. I remember moments when I was living my passions, but they were often flanked by periods of doubt and uncertainty. I’m almost ashamed to admit that I once resisted becoming a grandmother because of my perceptions of what grandparents “are supposed to be”. My grandchildren are gifts that constantly remind me of the true meaning of living a life of joy. Maybe you’re just beginning to think about having kids or are now raising small children. If so, I know it can be an overwhelming time, but please pay attention to what they’re teaching you. The most profound lessons show up when you least expect them but always when they’re being their authentic selves. I believe this is when you learn the most about them, too. And as much as you can, encourage them to stay that way. Foster the development of their unique talents and capabilities; those things that bring them the most joy and vitality so that some day, they too, won’t have to remember when…